The Fame Game II: L.A. Heartbreaker Review – A Cringe-Fest with a Green Card?

Don’t share this on the internet, but I was quietly looking forward to The Fame Game II: L.A. Heartbreaker, as I do like a good FMV yarn – even if it’s a big ol’ bowl of cringe and I have to flip my laptop screen each time the wife (or kids) pop in. “Oh, it’s a violent game. I don’t want you to see it”. They know…

Yes, Five Hearts Under One Roof stole my heart as the benchmark for this type of game. I am under no illusions that I am playing a dating game of ladies out of my league (as in, I’m too good for them), though you’re going to have to be good with the dialogue or, at the very least, have someone with charisma that makes me want to stick it out.

The original Fame Game was bad, but I still stuck it out. That was probably because I was invested in some of the characters (what was that remark about being under no illusions?), and it was entertaining. The Fame Game II: L.A. Heartbreaker has a few things that would indicate ‘improvements’, but for me, I much preferred the original.

For starters, the women are different, taking into account viewers/gamers/NEETs’ preferences. I prefer the girl next door with all their quirks, flaws, and iffy makeup, whereas here, they’re characterless Instaplanks. They also talk funny. Cancellation coming…

Subtitles Please! Actually, No Thanks

What I mean by funny is the language. I wanted to turn off the subtitles immediately, as they were distracting my gaze from the opening. In The Fame Game II: L.A. Heartbreaker’s menu, there were no options to switch them off (like its predecessor), but when returning to the game, the actors were speaking in Mandarin.

I’m not being irreverent intentionally; I’m a world cinema fanatic and watch everything subtitled unless I know the language, be it English and the odd Japanese thing. My first impressions gave off Island of Hearts, which was very similar, had higher-than-normal production levels, but also lacked the charm.

Shuhan is an international student and gets mistaken for the fiancé of some bird named Ayaka, and she wants to get married. Really, you should. She’s attractive, has money, and boasts a bunch of plastic mafia-wannabes who are as threatening as soggy salami.

To All You Virgins

The game puts you into the role of young master, where you have to convince Ayaka you’re someone else. If you do, the real fiancé will get your green card and tuition fees paid. In the meantime, you can try to woo some other ladies. It’s a shame that Ayaka was the one I wanted to do. I mean, woo.

The interaction is typically one of two options to take you down a path that’s accessible via a timeline once a chapter is completed. There are also some QTEs, though they aren’t so quick; RSQTEs (relatively slow quick time events) don’t sound as good.

Unlike another FMV from this week, Akiba Lost, The Fame Game II: L.A. Heartbreaker is on rails, and you’re mostly watching all these actors posing and waiting for their cues. I soon found myself disinterested, then listening out for ‘the jingle’ that plays when I needed to make a decision.

As a very happily married man – wait, she doesn’t read this – as a married man, I have to say that the interactions felt like they were designed for virgins. Or maybe I come from a different generation that watches women from afar (behind a curtain), rather than interact this way. This is why humour and self-awareness work well with these titles.

Is This Real Life?

I think that’s my biggest beef with The Fame Game II: L.A. Heartbreaker. The production is excellent, the ladies are charming, I’m sure, but it’s not so self-aware. I found this more pervy than some of the adult games I’ve reluctantly played in the past. Continually watching them pout was rough. At least with games like Don’t Fool Me Beauties, they make fun of the awkwardness.

I dunno, there are definitely going to be people who find it fun, and as of writing, The Fame Game II: L.A. Heartbreaker scores overwhelmingly positive on Steam. Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t hate it, but I was more self-aware than the game was.

All I wanted was a bit of escapism where I had a chance with one of these lovelies. Dammit – what did I just say! Don’t share that on the internet.