Thunder Hoop Collection Review – A Retro Remaster That’ll Make You Rage-Quit

QUByte Interactive have done it again, releasing an obscure, value-for-money cult ‘classic’ in Thunder Hoop Collection. It depends entirely on how much you love the original material and whether you’re up for a challenge.

The publisher can’t do wrong in bringing polished retro games to the forefront, especially in a time where most people are either reliving older titles for nostalgia or playing whatever they can run on their retro handhelds amidst this cost-of-RAM quandary we’re in.

Irrespective of how good value their titles are, with excellent emulation including rewind features, filters, bezels, cheats, and spells that help your libido, we have to look at the source material underneath all that glam.

A Brutal Lesson in Patience

I didn’t like the first game in Thunder Hoop Collection: Thunder Hoop. Yes, this would have been a game I’d have easily played on the Amiga back in the early 90s, though without a God cheat, I’d have bailed. It’s brutally hard.

Combat is good with our genetically modified hero, Thunder Hoop, shooting ballistics out of his wrists that would make Shang-Chi impotent. These blasts go off in most directions, including diagonally up, and vertically whilst on ladders.

Sounds like a shrug from modern gamers; it wasn’t always a feature in the past. You can’t shoot diagonally down, and instead have to jump on an enemy – a la Mario – only to launch into a spawning enemy.

That, my friends, is the absolute bane of my existence: spawning enemies. That twat, Professor Genbreak, the antagonist, has created 1000s of enemies. There are no swarms, though enemies appear out of nowhere, as do their projectiles.

Without any health, it’s an insta-kill for Hoop Boy, and even the built-in cheat of infinite continues does not stop this from being tough. It’s frustrating, and the audio of him screaming in agony every five seconds is irritating.

The same goes for platforming, as he’s very floaty. It’s workable, but with the constant spawning of enemies and projectiles to dodge, I didn’t enjoy it and would say TH Strikes Back fares better than this.

TH Strikes Back

In the two years since the first one, Thunder Hoop has become a man. A Liu Kang meets Goku type. With that burst of maturity, we also see the introduction of boobs. Space Amazonians who shake their wobbly bits, then explode on death.

TH Strikes Back is much better to play and more forgiving. That said, the boss stages are ridiculous, with the final boss taking way too much damage and shredding your lives and credits.

There isn’t much of a plot, so each stage is about getting to the end boss, killing and earning points along the way. There’s seemingly an endless supply of enemies and opportunities for earning ridiculous scores if you’re willing to stand still and earn it.

Thunder Man will do the same wristy shooty things and, on death, will retire to a hovering cereal hoop, allowing you to respawn where you like. It’s all very run-of-the-mill, but entertaining nonetheless.

There are a couple of spaceship-destroying set pieces while darting about in a ball of flame, resembling something like R-Type, then there’s this moving platform thing where you have to shoot alien plants, then jump and duck obstacles. There are no checkpoints in these bits, which is equally frustrating.

Back For More?

Like many of the games from the era, Thunder Hoop Collection doesn’t offer much in the way of replay value. If you grew up with the game, maybe that’s something, but once it’s done, that’s it.

QUByte have done a great job with what’s available, and in fairness, there’s nothing else you could add to it. While I appreciate the costs involved, it would be great if the publisher could get their hands on some real classics from the Amiga era, as I’m confident they’d do a good job with the restoration process and scanline-enabled goodies.