Eggcelerate! An Eggcellent Eggsample Of An Indie Game – PC Review

YOLK: You Only Like Kinder Surprise. Meh, it's late in the day and I'm out of puns or anything remotely clever. Read this Eggcelerate! review as compensation.

Leave your egg and gluten allergies at the proverbial doorway: Eggcelerate! doesn’t discriminate in its approach to the masses. Come, celebrate the ovum in glorious technocolour (the other one is a TM), as we attempt to stuff our egg into one calamitous basket.

It feels like an age since writing the news piece on this indie title, and glad to have played it. On the first inspection, the concept was great, and the visuals were brilliant. Not being one for reading up on what anyone else thinks (who reads game reviews these days?!) I did get lured down a rabbit hole that it might not be what I think it would be.

But, with the willpower that would be advantageous to a late-night ‘reader’ of PornHub, these distractions were dismissed, and the game was played to the max, with reserved judgement, for mein own two eyes, ears and a mouth.

Those ears were the first to offer up a critique by suggesting we turned down the music, eh, precious? It didn’t work for me at all, and found it rather annoying. Still, I don’t listen to chart music anymore, and they’re selling a few records – it’s just preference really. Let’s say I survived by playing Mr Bungle’s Egg on loop (factual).

Eggcelerate - Loopy
Loopy. Source: Steam

The aim in Eggcelerate! is much like the egg and spoon race of old where you have to reach the finish line first, a.k.a. the fastest time possible, a.k.a. once more: beating the dev, Tim Beaudet, time. He uses cheats. However, we all know that the real achievement is finishing without dropping your egg, and that’s theoretically what Eggcelerate! is; the egg and spoon race only with vehicles.

With a focus on physics, you have to circumnavigate increasingly tricky courses while transporting an egg in a container strapped to the roof. Note that it’s the container that’s fixed, not the egg. Another way of measuring the difficulty is simply looking at the floor. Every time you drop an egg, it remains on the floor, and while embedded in the tarmac, it may as well be on your face, thus reminding you of your flaws.

The egg will roll back and forth as you take corners a little too aggressively, leaping over ramps, or perhaps saying balls to gravity as you do a loop-the-loop. There are booby traps too, and obstacles purely to stop you from reaching the goal. All very convincing, all very tense – but more importantly, fun. 

Initial comparisons were Super Skidmarks or Micro Machines, but that’s just an uneducated guess based on its viewpoint and quirkiness. Eggcelerate! isn’t a gimmick, but a very enjoyable casual game. Tell that to my kid, and she’ll Mumm-ra punch you as she got frustrated with it – especially the boxing gloves of doom. I blame the parents. Scratch that: Their TikTok attention span.

Eggcelerate out this month
Source: Steam

Getting through the bulk of reviews titles from the last couple of weeks, Eggcelerate! was put on the backburner, and I regret it. Told by the wife that as crucial as it is to play games to review them, I need to be downstairs with the fam; I downloaded the game onto the MacBook Pro. I can see why the Mac gets so much stick for gaming.

For a simple game such as this, it jolted back and forth, missing keyframes, breaks in the sound and more. It’s no fault of the game, just the hardware. Fortunately, even running on 800×600(!) Eggcelerate! looks great, but more importantly, it played better on my lap, though the heat it was emitting was enough to cook bacon. EGGS! Dammit, I should have said eggs!

Jumping on the controller wasn’t as good as the keyboard, in my opinion. While you can make incremental adjustments on the analogue sticks, I played the game as if typing, gently tapping accelerate and turn to avoid any Humpty homicides. That worked better for me, but it’s nice to have the option there if you’re allergic to eggs and keyboards.

So yeah, a very good experience all around. There are plenty of levels and more than enough achievements to keep you busy. The timer challenges are much more forgiving than most games as you don’t need a perfect run, and it’s so uplifting to get an eggchievement to say you beat the time – such a rarity in my gaming legacy.

Eggcelerate! - Eggy
Eggy. Source: Steam

The only thing I didn’t like about it was the music and some sound effects. While I didn’t turn off the latter, they were a little corny and reminded me of those international comedy clips you watch on a long-haul flight (remember them?) like Just For Laughs. It’s a shame really, as Eggcelerate! doesn’t feel like a corny game considering it has so much opportunity to go that route. 

Instead, it’s the hard-boiled egg of longevity rather than a cracked egg of novelty, and I recommend this as part of a balanced diet of fun and satisfying physics-based hilarity. It’s easily one of the best indie games I’ve played of late and well worth seeking out. You’re going to have to smash a few eggs to get those achievements.

If you share this, I'll love you forever (ish)